First-90-Days Nanny Onboarding Checklist

The first 90 days of a placement is where every meaningful expectation is set — explicitly or accidentally. The rules that get written down and reviewed weekly become the norms; the rules that get briefed once and never revisited drift. By month four, the placement is operating on whatever combination of explicit-and-drifted rules emerged from those first 90 days. Re-establishing rules in month six is dramatically harder than establishing them in week two.

The checklist forces the work of those 90 days into a visible structure. None of the items is hard. The work is that they happen on schedule.

Week 1: household walkthrough, role expectations, schedule confirmed in writing, kitchen menu co-designed, screen-time and snack rules posted on kitchen cupboard, payment date and method confirmed.

Week 2: first structured Sunday 15-minute check-in. What's working, what's hard, what to align on. Mandarin alignment conversation script in the kit.

Weeks 3–4: weekly check-ins continue. Discipline-style alignment if needed. Children's preference patterns documented.

Week 6 (end of probation typical): structured probation review. 10-item scored check-list. Decision: convert to ongoing or end. Documented in writing.

Weeks 7–12: check-in cadence drops to fortnightly. Rules refined as children's developmental stages shift.

Week 13 (end of 90 days): full 30-minute review with the nanny. What's working, what to change for the next quarter. Adjustments to schedule, rules, or compensation discussed.

Three rhythms layer:

• Daily handoff (5 minutes): brief 'how was the day' conversation when the nanny finishes the daytime shift or when the family returns home. Operational only — what happened, anything notable. Not the place for feedback.
• Weekly Sunday check-in (15 minutes): scheduled, private, alignment-framed. The most important meeting in the placement. Drops to fortnightly after week 6.
• Monthly review (30 minutes): structured discussion of how the month went, what's drifting, what to lock in. Documented briefly in a one-pager that the family keeps.

Most drifts can be reset in a check-in conversation. A few warrant immediate escalation:

• Safety concerns (CPR readiness, fall risk, dietary compliance with allergens). Address immediately, not at the next Sunday.
• Physical correction or harsh tone with children. Non-negotiable; address the same day.
• Repeated specific drift after two written alignments. Escalation to the agency.
• Child fear or distress signals. Trust the child's signal.

Most issues are not these. Most are alignment gaps that close in 1–2 conversations.

Form below. Name + email + relocation stage. The checklist PDF (shanghai-nanny-90-day-onboarding-checklist-2026.pdf) arrives via email within 2 minutes. 14 pages including printable weekly check-in sheets, the probation review scorecard, and the Mandarin alignment-conversation scripts.

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